I've been quiet for a while and I feel as though I should apologize for my absence. But then that's not my style.
I'm getting married on Saturday. I will join the ranks of the chained in holy matrimony to a woman who can kick my BACK-SIDE because by god someone has to once in a while. I've got two whole weeks off from Retail Hell and damn is it good to be free. Everyone keeps asking me if I'm nervous or scared or having dreams that wake me up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat scared out of my mind wondering what the hell is going through my head. But no. I'm passed that. At this point I just want the goddamn vacation.
I got started early. Firday I got horrible, twisted drunk bar-hopping with my coworkers. And then Saturday the sons of bitches took me out for my bachelor party. I haven't drank that much in a long time without getting horribly sick, and definitely not two nights in a row. But I managed to keep it down. I'd never been to a strip club before that night. It was a unique experience and the only way I got through it was by making light of my situation. Unfortunately one member of our party was (is? i mean he still exists in the present tense as much as he existed in that moment, he's not like the ones who stop existing when they're not around me) gay, so he didn't manage to stick around through the entire thing. I can't fault him.
I almost got in a fight with a drunken, saxaphone playing hobo. But it's okay I know the guy. By know the guy I mean he tried to pick a fight with us several months back when he was drunk and surly, but I'm surly by default, putting five shots of various alchohols in me and a dozen beers only enhances my need to destroy whatever is around me, and lacking any external options I'll go for the self-destruction. I ended up busting my hand on a gate as I was leaving the subway coming home.
My hand and my liver are fine, though my stomach still has issues with the crap I've been doing for the past couple of days. I've got to pack while hungover. But I've been watching Fringe while recuperating. Seriously, why are you reading this and not watching that show? It is going to be the best show this year. X-Files was like wading in the kiddy pool compared to this. It's scary and smart and you should pull the covers over your head after watching it and pray this sort of whacked out science can't happen.
No, I'm sober right now. But I do have another bachelor party to endure. So if you're watching or have watched Fringe, that cow is awsome. Too bad they're gonna kill it.
Tags: Drugs Cow Cows Fringe Marriage Married Bachelor Party Weekend Vacation Frin
